You Become the Boss of You

A co-worker of mine shared a cute anecdote about an incident she experienced concerning her daughter. Being a military brat (I use the term loosely), her daughter occasionally had a difficult time adjusting to the absence and then sudden re-appearance of her father in her life. This was especially true when it came to his role as disciplinarian.

Well, on this particular occasion, my co-worker's husband was in the process of reprimanding her, and the little princess put her hands on her hips (she couldn't have been older than 3-4 years old) and retorted (paraphrased), "You're not the boss of me! Mommy, tell him: You're the boss of me!" Needless to say, both mother and father did what any responsible parent would do: nearly choked, holding back from laughing before the child, and did their best to explain why, yes, indeed, he was the boss of her, too. Later they fell out with laughter.

Sometimes I think we all run into situations like that on our jobs: trying to figure out who you work for, who you ultimately need to satisfy as far as issues of productivity are concerned on a given issue. And sometimes it gets a little hairy trying to deal with opposing egos. How do you keep out of the line of fire? (Surely you don't question the virtue of staying out of battles that don't pertain to you -- unless you feel you have job immunity indefinitely!) 

I have found that, especially in the case where you are acting as a change agent in an organization, the best approach to take is to take responsibility for yourself. View yourself as a team player (definitely be loyal to your team captain), but always act in a manner that protects you: You have to become the boss of YOU.

Your objective must be to maintain your own identity, your own brand name so that should the Titans clash, with you in the midst, you can be the tiny giant that removes his or her self from the messy situation and walks away unscathed - careerwise. That means you have to be meticulous about your work, and the quality work you are turning out; you have to take your current position seriously, now more than ever before, to help build your value as an employee. But most importantly, one who finds his or her self in precarious situations between administrative battles has to be able to answer the question of loyalty within his or her self. Be true to you; but don't stoop to fancy antics to set up others. In these situations, you likely will not adequately know the lay-of-the-land. You don't know all of the issues surrounding the skirmish. Let nature take its course; in the end the right will prevail (meaning, the situation will resolve itself). And hopefully, no matter how things turn out, you're none the worse off in the end.